The Yodeling Veterinarian of the Alps is a song narrated by a quartet made up of the Rapscallions and Frankencelery. Larry is a veterinarian who yodels to cure his various patients, with Pa Grape as his nurse.
Quartet Singers: Hm, hm, hm, hm. There lived a man so long ago his memory's but faint. Was not admired. Did not inspire like president, or saint. Yet people came from far and near with their afflicted pets. For a special cure, they knew for sure, wouldn't come from other vets. Woooah-ooh...
Larry: This is a song, for your poor sick penguin. He has a fever and his toes are blue. But if I sing to your poor sick penguin, he will feel better, in a day or two. Yodel-leh-hee yodel-eee-ooo. Yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hoo.Ya-de ya-de ya-de ya-de ya-de-doo!
(Penguin spits out thermometer)
Pa Grape: (to Junior) He's gone a little loopy, in case you hadn't heard. Here's a couple penicillin for your sickly, arctic bird.
Quartet Singers: Mm, mm, mmmmmm... No skeptic could explain just how, nor could one oft rebut, the wondrous deeds that went on in that little alpine hut. Some would stand in silence while some just scratched their scalps. For the curious ways of the yodeling veterinarian of the alps. Woooahh-ooh...
Pa Grape: Good news on the penguin, doc! He's up and kicking.
Larry: This is a song, for your pregnant kitty. She's looking nauseous and a week past due, but if I sing to your pregnant kitty, she will feel better in a day or two. Yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hoo. Yodel-leh-hee yodel-ye-dee yodel-eee-ooo.Yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hee yodel-aye-hoo. Yada-yada yada-yada ya-ga-doo!
Pa Grape: (to Bob) Jump in your car, dive into the city, buy a jug of milk for your nauseated kitty. (hands Bob a coupon for milk)
Quartet Singers: Mm, mm, mmmmmm... The practice grew, their profits flew until one fateful day, when the nurse who did assist the doc asked for a raise in pay. The doctor pondered this a while, sat back and scratched his scalp. Then said:
Larry: No way, Jose!
Quartet Singers: To the nurse of the yodeling veterinarian of the alps. Woooah-ohh...
Pa Grape: Good news on the kitty doc. She's feelin' great. Six kittens, named one after you.
Larry: This is a song, for your bear-trapped teddy. He looks uncomfy, think I'd be too. But if I sing to your bear-trapped teddy, he will feel better in a day or two. Yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hoo. Yodel-leh-hee o-layhee oly-ooo. Yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hoo. Yodel-leh-hee yaba-daba daba-doo!
Bear: Rawr! Rawr-ah-ar-ah.
Pa Grape: Oh yeah. That'll work. He's good.
Bear: (Roaring continually through backround)
Larry: Yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hoo! No, wait! This should work! Yodel-leh-hee! Yodel-leh-hoo yodel-leh-hoo! Ooo! Yodel-hoo!
Quartet Singers: Mm, mm, mm, mmm... Now the moral of our story, it's the point we hope we've made: When you go a little loopy better keep your nurse well paid!
Larry: (being chased by the bear) Yodel-leh-hee! Yodel-leh-hoo! Yodel odle odle aye de aye de ooo-ooo-ooo!
Quartet Singers: Wooah! Some would stand in silence, while some just scratched their scalps, for the curious ways of the Yodeling Veterinarian of the Alps!
Larry: (still running from the bear) Yodel-hoo!